Christmas is not merry for everyone

Some people can get bogged down by holiday expectations

Jimmy Cannon said Christmas is a holiday that persecutes the lonely, the frayed and the rejected.

While egg nog and cider may warm the hearts of many during the holidays, for others the arrival of the season brings a case of the holiday blues.

Without realizing it, even people who usually feel festive during the holidays can find themselves feeling overwhelmed by commitments and suffering frequent headaches, a loss of interest in activities, irritability or having difficulty sleeping, among other symptoms. Holiday depression can be triggered by factors that include stress, finances, new or unresolved grief, distance from family or friends and physical health.

"Depending on how things are going during the holidays it can be really disappointing to face," said Donna R. B. Rogers, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist.

During a workshop she hosted on Dec. 11 at the WomensCare Center of Excellence of St. Rose Dominican Hospital, Rogers led participants through the common causes of holiday depression, including a worksheet of questions.

"For most people, the obligations of the holiday are piled on top of our regular work," Rogers said. "Yet, we try to achieve the impossible anyway."

According to Rogers, the internal conflict between an idealized or "perfect" holiday season and the reality of time, money and other factors can wear away at some people. For many suffering from the holiday blues, it can start with unrealistic expectations ranging from gift spending to family issues. Unmet expectations can begin to snowball, collecting resentment, guilt, fatigue and overcommitment along the way.

Soon, she added, disappointment can lead to sadness, anger or depression.

Some of the triggers to holiday depression, said Rogers, include issues that are difficult for some year round. Tight paychecks, recent layoffs or other life changes, including moving far from family, the empty nest syndrome or loss of a loved one, can put a strain on people.

Lucy, a Henderson resident who wished not to be identified by her real name, said she suffers from clinical depression all year. For her, the holidays bring up painful childhood memories, and this year she was out of work so there is financial stress.

"There's something about Christmas that makes you want to keep up with the Joneses," Lucy said.

Because she has less money to spend on the holidays this year, she worries that she can't reciprocate holiday invitations, she said. "Then I turn my attitude around and think, 'At least I'm not at the homeless shelter.' "

Some cases of holiday blues can be attributed entirely or in part to SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder, a syndrome resulting from less exposure to sunlight. SAD symptoms can mirror those of depression, including a difficulty concentrating, anxiety or a loss of interest in sex or other activities.

Holiday blues may be real, but a report released last year by The Annenberg Public Policy Center of the University of Pennsylvania reported a link between holiday depression and increased suicides does not exist. According to the center, suicide rates peak in the spring. The report also highlighted a possible hazard in linking the two during the holidays as it may produce "suicide contagion" or "copycat" suicides.

The report continued, "Despite the fact that the majority of persons who commit suicide suffer from a mental disorder such as (clinical) depression, making the winter holiday-suicide connection gives readers a different and more sexy explanation for the occurrence of suicide."

Kay Redfield Jamison, a Johns Hopkins professor and psychologist, also exposes the truth about the holiday suicide rate in her book "Night Falls Fast," according to a USA Today report from December 1999. The book deals with the subject of suicide in many ways, including dispelling the myth of increased suicide rates during the holidays.

"It's a myth that the holidays are worse for people than other times of the year," Jamison said in the December 1999 USA Today article.

Even though suicides do not increase during the holidays, Rogers cautions that any suicidal urges or threats should be taken seriously. The Suicide Prevention Hot Line of Nevada is (877) 885-4673.


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