Tale of bad man makes for a good read

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Just about everybody knows someone who has a garden they love more than anything in the universe.

Maybe it's your grandma's garden or the one that belongs to the lady next door. Perhaps it's a garden in your city's park or maybe it's in your own back yard. Wherever it is, nobody is allowed to play in it!

Rotten old Mr. Gum keeps his garden looking good, too, but it's not because he loves it. In the new audiobook, "You're a Bad Man, Mr. Gum!" written and read by Andy Stanton, you'll hear why.

Mr. Gum was the nastiest man alive, and everyone in Lemonic Bibber knew it. He didn't like anything except scowling, and his house was simply grimsters. But Mr. Gum had the most magnificent garden in the world.

One day, a real whopper of a dog named Jake got into Mr. Gum's garden.

Jake rolled around in Mr. Gum's garden and before long, it was a total wreck. What's worse is that Jake left little "gifts" for Mr. Gum, and you know what kind of gifts I mean.

Mr. Gum was mad! He went inside his messy house, sat down on the pirate's treasure chest and thought out a plan. He would get some meat from the butcher and he would poison that enormous dog!

But Mr. Gum spoke too loudly, and a little girl playing by the hedge overheard his plan. The little girl's name was Jammy Grammy Lammy F'Huppa F'Huppa Berlin Stereo Eo Eo Lebb C'Yepp Nermonica Le Straypek De Grespin De Crespin De Spespin De Vespin De Whoop De Loop De Brunkle Merry Christmas Lenoir. If you're her friend, you can call her Polly.

Anyhow, Polly wasn't going to let Mr. Gum poison Jake. She liked him! As Polly was searching for help, the dog ate some poisoned hearts. Can Polly save the day and Jake's life?

You might see "You're a Bad Man, Mr. Gum!" on the shelf of your local store or library, and you're going to be tempted to throw it in your cart. Don't.

Pass on the paper version and get the audiobook. Hearing author Andy Stanton read his own work is absolutely the only way to enjoy this supremely silly story.

"You're a Bad Man, Mr. Gum!" is one of those tales that gets more and more outrageous with each track, adding hilarious details to a storyline that's already giggle-generating. The best part is that you won't mind listening to this audiobook because there are things in here that are slightly above the average child's understanding, which means adults will find plenty of good laughs, too.

If you've got a 6- to 12-year-old with a goofy streak of humor, grab this audiobook. "You're a Bad Man, Mr. Gum!" is a very good story.

Terri Schlichenmeyer's book reviews appear weekly in the View. She can be reached by e-mail at bookwormsez@yahoo.com.